Day 311 | Wednesday, November 4 | 2009

Vanity...

Its hard to believe that one year ago today Barack Obama was elected President. Usually the years go by faster as time goes on but I feel that this past year has been strangely slow. Maybe I feel like this because I feel like I have personally grown up a lot in the past year -- especially in the face of certain challenges that have forced me to grow.

I keep on ignoring the "blocked" calls on my cell phone because I know that they are from political organizations trying to raise money for: the Democratic party, League of Conservation of Voters, or any other left-wing organization that wants money. They are calling me because I have given donations in the past but I can't afford to give anything now or in the future. I feel conflicted because I really would like to see a revamping of our 'health care' system in America but I cannot commit to donate time or money right now. A lot of things seem so messed up politically in our country. The Republicans, especially, seem to be out of sorts on almost all of the issues. I consider myself a moderate (leaning mostly to the left) but there is not one thing about the Republican party (or their platforms) that I agree with. This goes for everything from economic issues to social issues.

In general, I tend to simply loathe the bipartisan system in this country and how the media play into the situation. I wish the political discourse in our country could be more pragmatic and less concerned with political capital. Democrats are guilty of this too but it seems a lot more of a problem with Republican's more so. Most of them are sour for losing their seats from the 2008 election, for losing the presidency, and just in general losing their power to control everyone.

Other news ... here is a vain picture of myself that I took this morning. I don't generally like to take pictures of myself.

Day 270 | Thursday, September 24 | 2009

Perfect Day...

Today was a really good day. I took Caitlin out for dinner at Casa Nueva and then surprised her with tickets to see Yo la Tengo at Stuart's Opera House.

I have never seen a music show quite like this -- the stage presence and energy exuded by the players was very zen-like. It was as if the players never felt like the music was ever really out of their control. The guitarist played like a mad man -- he was hurling and slinging his guitar around the stage like a dog stripping a bone raw. His solos and inflections were truly possessed. I am so glad I got to see this show -- it goes up there among the best shows I have ever seen for sure. Caitlin and I went with our good friend Rob and it was the perfect end to a perfect day.

Earlier on I recorded this song using my the video feed on my computer. I put some hackneyed effects on it to make it look antiquated but I don't care. The song is Nuestro Juramento by Julio Jaramillo and here are the lyrics:

Nuestro Juramento

No puedo verte triste porque me mata tu carita de pena; mi dulce amor, me duele tanto el llanto que tu derramas que se llena de angustia mi corazón.

I cannot see you sad because it kills me

Your little face (full) of sorrow, my sweet love.

It pains me so much, the tears that you spill,

That my heart fills up with anguish.

Yo sufro lo indecible si tu entristeces, no quiero que la duda te haga llorar, hemos jurado amarnos hasta la muerte y si los muertos aman, despues de muertos amarnos más.

I suffer unspeakably if you sadden,

I do not want doubt to make you cry.

We have vowed to love each other until death

And if the dead (can) love,

After dying, to love each other more.
 

Si yo muero primero, es tu promesa, sobre de mi cadaver dejar caer todo el llanto que brote de tu tristeza y que todos se enteren de tu querer.

If I die first, it is your promise,

Over my cadaver let fall

All the tears that spring from your sadness

And let everyone hear of your love. 

 Si tu mueres primero, yo te prometo, escribiré la historia de nuestro amor con toda el alma llena de sentimiento; la escribire con sangre, con tinta sangre del corazón

If you die first, I promise you,

I will write the story of our love

With my whole spirit filled with emotion;

I will write it with blood,

With the tinted blood of the heart.

Day 196 | Tuesday, July 14 | 2009

Self-Portrait...

I got back tonight and it feels alright.  I spent the day studying and organizing my apartment.  There is so much to do...

I don't feel like writing much today.

Here is a picture I took of myself in my apartment.  I hate pictures of myself but my vanity drove me to take this one.  

Día 148 | Miércoles, 27 de Mayo | 2009

On the Beach...

Today we arrived at the Cotococha Lodge.  This is a pretty rustic (yet luxurious lodge) right on the Río Napo.  The Río Napo is a fairly large river in Ecuador and serves as a tributary for the Amazon.  

In the morning, we went on a fairly long hike exploring the rain forest.  The forest we toured was a secondary rain forest (it has re-grown from prior destruction) and we learned a lot of neat facts about plants and animals there.  At first, it seemed like our guide Alfredo was just trying to scare us.  He kept telling us horror story after horror story -- snakes, ants, and plants that had the capacity to kill.  Midway through the hike, I was wondering why we were there.  But it all turned out very well, though, everyone came out of the forest without a scratch.

After lunch (by the way -- lunch was really amazing -- lunch was served in a buffet style) we went on exploring a nearby waterfall.  The waterfall was really strong today because it had rained a lot last night.  I jumped into the waterfall and swam around.  The water was cold but it was so refreshing.  On the negative side of things, the current was so strong that it took my watch.  

After the waterfall, we went back on the canoe to go inner-tubing down the river.  The inner-tubing trip lasted for about 25 minutes and has been one of my favorite things we have done in Ecuador.  All the while, I was a little afraid of being attacked by an anaconda but, in the end, I came out safe and sound.  Here is a picture of me and my program mates pushing off into the Río Napo.

Day 9 | Friday, January 9 | 2009

Moku Coffee...

There is a new coffee shop on West Union street -- all the way down towards where the Habitat for Humanity House is located.  The coffee shop is nice.  It has a comfortable ambience and a wonderful view of the Hocking River and White's Mill.  

Caitlin and I met today with Leslie who is such a wonderful person through and through.  We spent some time talking about her recent trip to India and then also Caitlin and I talked about our recent trip to Switzerland.  I am amazed at some of the implications of Leslie's stories.  It makes me feel lucky to be so privileged in comparison to many of the people that live in abject poverty.  

Most of all, though, it was just nice to spend time with a friend.  

Day 3 | Saturday, January 3 | 2009

Brand New Day...

I have never liked the Winter season but I have always revered the possibility of newness and of change.  Newness and change for the better, that is.  New years bring about resolutions in the general sense and here are some of mine for this year:

1.  To ride my bike more

This has several benefits for me -- one it will cut cost in gas prices and parking meter fares.  Also, it will be a source of exercise and activity in daily life.  Another benefit to riding my bike with more frequency will be to reduce any CO2 emissions into the atmosphere.  It is a small part but every little bit counts.

2.  To keep in touch with my family and loved ones better

I figure that I should just make a list of e-mail addresses of people that are close to me in my life and send out an e-mail or an eCard once a month.  Life is too short for me to lose connections with people who have meant so much to me.

3.  To keep a regular journal where I can record my thoughts

Here is where Beans with Garlic comes in -- I vow to take a photograph (and the quality just has to be somewhat present) everyday to record where I was, what I was thinking, how I was feeling, my hopes, my dreams, etc.  Perhaps that will help me feel a greater sense of direction.  Call it a work in progress.

4.  Manage my time better

There are many times where I have a lot of idle time surfing the Internet or just spending time badly.  I know this will be a hard habit to mend but I need to spend my time better.  There are courses at the AAC in the library that I should enroll in (or take survey in) that could help me with

5.  Grow in my relationship with Caitlin

We see each other most every day but it is important to me to keep this relationship strong and healthy.  She means more to me than anyone else in the world and I know this is something that is beautiful and good to me but it is also something that needs to be nurtured and worked at.  Simple communication, gifts, gestures, and reminders that I love her will be something that I will work towards.

6.  Have a healthier lifestyle .

I feel like in this past year I have been pretty unhealthy as compared to years prior.  I have gained somewhere between 17-19 lbs. (in just a year!!) and a lot of my clothes do not fit me anymore.  I really need to make a conscious effort to get back (a little more) to where my life used to be.  If I break it down, I could do things in smaller and gradual intervals.  I'll try to eat more vegetables, less fats and sugars, little or no alcohol, and make exercise a part of my daily routine.  

By the end of the Winter quarter, I'll try to lose 5 lbs.

By the end of the Spring quarter, I'll try to lose another 5lbs.

These are all pretty general and in no particular order.  I will come back to these in future entries to see where I am at.

February 2008

February was filled with important dates

1.)  February 23rd -- first date with Caitlin!  I love this woman with all of my heart.  I will never forget that night.  I know that this song is not really relevant on the surface (because the speaker of the song is talking about breaking up) but this song reminds me of Caitlin in every way.

"Birds" by Neil Young

Lover, there will be another one

Who'll hover over you beneath the sun

Tomorrow see the things that never come

Today

When you see me

Fly away without you

Shadow on the things you know

Feathers fall around you

And show you the way to go

It's over, it's over.

Nestled in your wings my little one

This special morning brings another sun

Tomorrow see the things that never come

Today

When you see me

Fly away without you

Shadow on the things you know

Feathers fall around you

And show you the way to go

It's over, it's over.

2.)  February 20 -- My last haircut I have had.  I vow to not cut my hair for at least one year from that date.  So in theory the earliest time I will cut my hair will be no earlier than February 20, 2009.

There are not really any other momentous events in my life other than those, although my haircut is hardly momentous.  I feel awkward trying to express how I felt about Caitlin at the time in retrospection now.  For me, she had (and still is) the perfect friend.  She is kind, she listens, she cares, she is warm, she is down to earth, and she is so loving.  It is very easy for me to be myself around her.  Even when we first met and when I first looked in her eyes, I felt something very pure and true that I have never felt before with anyone else.  She understands me and I think I can understand her too.  We are in step with each other in communication and talking to each other.  We have had amazing laughs but we can also be sincere and earnest with each other too.

I have never met someone so amazing as I have with Caitlin.  I am very lucky.  

*****Hooper Ridge Road*****
My friend Shana took this during an attempt to learn photography insights.

*****Whale Mountain pt. 1******
There are some stories that I will claim as only mine.

*****After the Goldrush*****
I love you so clearly / I love you so fearlessly / I'll wake you up in the morning so early ...

*****Riley with Tire*****
Riley is the other dog of the Remnant/Torres household.  If there ever was a dog representation of Good Cop vs. Bad Cop then such would be the case with Riley and Hadley (respectively).  Riley is carefree, fun-loving, goofy, cute, playful and spirited.  He is hardly ever unkind to new people (unlike Hadley) and has the most hilarious personality I have seen in a dog.  Perhaps his only downfall is his hurried eating habits -- when he is fed, he eats the bowl of dog food in its entirety without stopping.  His weight is a slight issue (poor guy) but his cuteness is overwhelming.  

*****Mama Renie's Pizza*****
One of our first dates, Caitlin and I volunteered at the Arcade Fire show in Nelsonville (Stuart's Opera House).  It was such an amazing experience.  Amazing because it was highly unusual for such a metropolitan and world-popular band like The Arcade Fire to play a FREE show in such a small and (most importantly) nearby town.  We ate pizza before the show at Mama Renie's which is right across the street from the Opera House.

*****Volunteers*****
Here we are wearing the Stuart's Opera House t-shirts that were given to the volunteers working the event.  Best friend Jamie is behind us (who also volunteered that day).

*****Up-Close*****
For one of the two free shows, this is where Caitlin and I stood.  We were practically on the stage!

*****The Arcade Fire*****
Although the full band was not there (it was 5 out of the 7 or 8 members of the band) the show was enthralling.  The energy of the 300 or so people in that small auditorium was marvelous.

*****The Arcade Fire II*****

*****Caitlin and Me with Win Butler*****

I asked Win Butler (lead singer of the band) if we could take a picture with him.  He seemed a little cold to the idea but he said sure.  Although the picture is out of focus (no one's perfect) it is still clear how much Win Butler towers over us.  He has to be 6'4'' or so.  Perhaps even a little taller.

January 2008

One of the most frazzling things that can happen to a person is to have one's wallet stolen.  It was the second Friday of the month at Casa Nueva.  International Dance Night was happening and I was there for a drink with Kate and Jen.  We got up to dance for a moment, I left my jacket in the booth and when I went to retrieve it minutes later it was gone!  I swore that I saw Dave Baer with it on, cantering down Court Street, but I am most likely jumping to conclusions.  The jacket had my wallet in it along with my key ring (car, storage, and miscellaneous keys in it).  Perhaps it was an omen for a hard winter, maybe it was fate, or it could have been a drunk coincidence, but Friday January 11th was the night I lost my wallet.

January had other promises, too.  I lost my job working for Stalwart Construction while Southeast Engine was on tour in the South.  We were staying in Athens, Georgia when we all heard the news (3 of the 4 touring members of the band worked for Stalwart).  It was a crushing blow to Leo and me because we had to find other resources for money.  Rem was able to keep the job with limited hours because of his work experience and because of the job's role in his ability to support himself and his wife Amanda.  Our bosses were sympathetic to the situation but it was the only thing that could be done.  There were about 12 guys on the crew in total and about 8 of them had to be let go.  What happened principally was that there was an accounting error in the realm of employees workman's compensation funds which led to a giant underestimation -- something like $26,000 the company owed in fees.  This is paraphrasing but the gist is there.

I ended up looking for more jobs but no one was hiring.  Morale was a little low, the economics of it all was disheartening, and I longed for something more.  I did not find any work anywhere and I was longing to be back in school or just the feeling that I was actually working for something.  Being in the band was enjoyable but it was not leading to fulfillment for me.  I realized this at this time and I decided that I must go back to school.  Everyone in the band supported me and it wasn't bad at all.  So then I would wait and tour until South by Southwest was over and I would go back to school.

I ended up replacing my driver's license, student ID, and credit cards too after the blowing theft.  I could see by then that my life was headed in a new direction.

*****Grating Nights***** 

Outside of Donkey Coffee & Espresso ~ The Best Coffeehouse in Ohio ~.  It was already cold out that night at the beginning of January and I was having a nice conversation with Emily and Jessie.

*****For My Coat, Wherever I May Find Her*****
Shivering outside of the Donkey.  This was the jacket that was stolen days later at Casa Nueva.  

*****Mad World*****

*****Costumes*****
Court Street across from the Courthouse and China King.  This is where Banana Road is.  It used to be a great record store called School Kids records, that is, until Wal-Mart came to Athens and ran it out of business.  Today you can get vintage costumes and posters there for reasonable prices.  For example, you can get 6 black German-made wizard outfits there for only $96.00US.  

*****Glasses*****
I bought this new pair of glasses with a part of the paycheck I got in December.  My old pair broke on tour back in November so it was nice to have some to wear again.  The month in between was difficult for any time my contacts were bothering me or during the night.

*****Hadley*****
Hadley is a white lab.  Or yellow lab.  Or lab mix?  Either way, she was once Leo's dog but is now Rem and Amanda's dog.  Leo got her at the pound and was attracted to her because she was the weirdest looking dog in there.  Hadley is so bizarre.  At times she seems like she is depressed, she most always looks worried, and she is terrified of thunder.  She hides underneath Rem and Amanda's bed during thunderstorms only to realize later that she cannot get out from under the bed!  Her downfall is that she is so protective.  It is dangerous to have Hadley in front of the house, even on a leash.  She has attacked several visitors but none of them had any injuries.  She usually doesn't like people she just meets but there are exceptions.  When she gets to know you, though, she generally warms up and is a very sweet dog.

*****Poofy Rope*****
This was taken at a gas station on our way to Gainesville, Florida for a series of small house shows at Leo's brother's apartment.  We all bought a bunch of hats at the store.  Rem's hat read "Florida:  Licensed to Party," Leo's said "Jesus is Lord:  'Nuff Said," Jessie's read "I Will Be back for you.  Signed, Jesus,"  and mine said "Ask me about my great grandkids."

*****Wetlands*****
We went for a bird-watching expedition with Leo's brother John down at a preserve near Gainesville.  It was spectacular and John was very informative.  If you look closely at this picture, you will be able to see an alligator at the edge of the water.

*****Brush*****
This was on the trail of our bird-watching hike.

*****Blue Team vs. Red Team*****

A shuffle board at the Map Room in Charleston, South Carolina.

November 2007

November 2007 is brazen with good memories. Sure the tour was exhausting but that is expected for anyone who is traveling for nearly a month in an enclosed space with four other guys. We finished our second regional tour in the mid-west as a part of our promotion of our CD, A Wheel Within a Wheel that came out in October. We played a lot of billiards during the tour -- one of our favorite past times, especially if the venue was not well attended (which happened with some frequency). Our show in Des Moines, Iowa was one of my favorites because we stayed up in a Red Roof Inn that my father had procured for us. I am ever grateful for the hotels that my dad put us up with whenever we were on the road. I hope one day I can repay him for that.

*****Coming to Terms with Touring*****
We ate a lot of apples on the road. These were the good kind although I don't know what they were called because usually Jesse and Leo were the grocery purchasers.

*****Skippy*****
More road dietary items.

*****Chandelier in Kalamazoo*****
We played a really neat show in Kalamazoo Michigan. It was one of the last nights of the tour and it was fun. It was in a church so I felt like Sufjan Stevens or the Arcade Fire, etc. People from Kalamazoo College were excited though and actually danced to our music!

*****Palm's Lake*****
This was on a hike after work sometime in November. Location: The Ridges, Athens, Ohio.

*****Little Red Nova*****
When I get a good hand, it's my master plan, I'm gonna stick it to the man, he won't see me again.

*****Greenfield's*****
This was Rem's truck at the time (or really the company truck) and later was passed on to Bobby. We were doing two decking jobs over at the Greenfield's out on Hooper Ridge Road. They had an adorable dog and I remember the site being cold and wet.

*****More Greenfield's*****
We built an octagonal-shaped deck in the back.

*****House Lamp*****

*****The Grog Shop with Grog Buddies*****
Southeast Engine had a show in mid November opening up for Bears in Cleveland. It was a fun time but it was especially fun to see best bud Jamie and Lauren too.

*****Facially Doomed*****

This photo showcases my inability to grow respectable facial hair.

October 2007

October 2007 was a spectacular month. Two regional tours for the band (Northeast and Midwest), lots of traveling, a CD release, lots of interim work, and plenty of friends to share it with. I am baffled on what to say about this in a sentence or paragraph. Lifetimes were compressed into this month -- I was able to travel far, gain perspective, and learn a lot about myself and those around me. Southeast Engine's record came out in mid October but we started the tour on October 10th for the first part of the tour. For the first part of the tour we played 11 shows in 11 days and then came back home to work for five days mainly because we were not at a point in publicity to get shows for a month straight. Regardless, the second regional tour resumed and we went from October 26th until November 10th going around the Midwest. There was a lot of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, immature potty humor, horrible van smells, grand skylines, loads of bands and musicians, traffic and navigation, late nights, wood floors, carpeted floors, bare floors, linoleum floors, and tons of new friends we encountered all along the way. CMJ was a highlight for sure -- it gave the band a chance for some exposure and an opportunity to canoodle and network with a bunch of industry people in NYC. While they were doing that, it was a great opportunity for me to catch up with Dustin and Gretchen and bona fide best bud Erin. I remember eating at Katz Deli with my brother before our CMJ show and it was superb. Gaelan was a new addition to Southeast Engine for the tour and I am very happy to had met him and had the opportunity to spend time with him and share a wonderful experience. One of the tour highlights was going to Rehoboth Beach, Delaware. We played at the Dogfishhead Brewery (they have world class beer) and the band save Rem and Me went for a night swim on the beach. I am happy with how those photos turned out. I was experimenting with the shudder speeds. The next day was fun in the sun with the band, full of sand, sun and blue sky water too.

*****Rem*****

October 10th 2007. We are preparing to leave Athens to go to the Tritone bar in Philadelphia.


*****Leo and Gaelan*****
Such an amorous photo of Leo and Gaelan.


*****Philadelphia*****
We had a little time to explore Philadelphia for the afternoon. We toured the downtown area, a local music shop, and the Masonic temple (although we could not enter the temple without paying so we didn't actually tour the tmeple).

*****Untitled*****


*****Shock & Awe*****

*****Shock & Awe pt.2*****

*****Supreme Band*****
They are getting ready for their case U.S. v. Southeast Engine.

*****Capitol*****
*****Glory*****
*****Bridge to the Sky*****
*****Untitled*****
*****Spider*****
Here was a performer in a house show we played at in Cambridge, Massachusetts. I don't remember her real name but she performed under the moniker Spider.

*****Boston Grave*****

*****Paul Revere's Grave*****

*****St. Francis Stature*****

*****Providence Radio Show*****
We played at the college radio station for Brown University in Providence. It was the second time Southeast Engine had performed at a radio show outside of Athens. The first one was my first show ever with the band back in 2005. This was an enjoyable experience and we had pizza afterwords.

*****Yale******
Leo walking around a Yale courtyard in New Haven. Jesse was nearby sprawled out in the grass like me. We met up with Alex Maymind later after playing at Cafe Nine with Hallelujah the Hills.

*****CMJ '07*****
This is the only photo I have of any member of Southeast Engine on stage at CMJ. It is Leo and he is walking across the stage before our set. We were the Misra babies so we went first and later on the more developed acts like Palomar and Centro-matic played.

*****The Music Industry*****

*****Erin*****
I had a great dinner with an even greater friend, Erin Barker. I was lucky and happy to see her. She has been living for over a year in Jersey City, New Jersey.

*****Untitled*****

*****Early Reflections*****

*****Delaware Night*****

*****Night Moves*****

*****Usher In*****

*****In the Middle*****

******The Cusp*****

*****Untitled*****

*****You Would Be a Kid Forever*****