Whale Mountain...Tonight I will walk to our spot and look out into the trees all around me. When I turn my flashlight off, I am enveloped in the darkness along with the fireflies and crickets. The din of the crickets' song undulates rapidly through this space and when I close my eyes I see a black swirling funnel. The sound is stark and doesn't echo and reminds me of the times my brother and I would rub our fingers together right by our ear drums to see if we could replicate the sound of bees. The funnel I see when I close my eyes is comprised of grey and black checkers and is a tube that sucks things in until they can never return. I open my eyes and look down toward my shoes thinking of that George Harrison lyric from today in my kitchen 'and to see you're only very small and life flows on within you and without you...'
Sometimes I picture the things I have seen in my life as if a slot machine were spinning around and things come sporadically -- a soccer game, standing on a beach, singing amid a large crowd, and walking around a vast city. A certain sadness ushers in, knowing that these things will never been seen quite the same way, or, the places will remain while I will pass.
I am so glad I have you, though, to share this time and these moments. You bring me very much happiness. I love you with all of my heart and blood.
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